Baby Talk

So, I spent this past weekend with my sisters, who between them, have about 73 children. While the actual number is 5, the omnipresence this weekend of small people at various stages of mobility and cognitive development, makes 73 a more accurate representation of the "Children Index." This is similar to the heat index. It may only be 90 degrees outside, but the humidity and proximity of Satan might make it feel like 190 degrees. It's mostly used as an excuse for old and lazy people to stay in their 72 degree home and bitch about the weather, but the concept is easily tranferred into an analogy for children.

That being said, please do not take the comments above as any indication that I do not love my nieces and nephews (with all of the words in the English language, there really should be one word that means 'the children of my siblings'). I do love them very much and I really enjoy being around them. It's just that I live alone, can listen to whatever I want, say whatever I want, and do whatever I want - regardless of the 'appropriateness,' volume, or time of day. So being around so many children for two full days around which one has to be so mindful of what one says or refers to, is an enormous departure from my normal life. This fact, along with the fact that absolutely none of my day-to-day human interaction is with people below the age of 22, I am not entirely sure how to talk to a baby. I don't just go around speaking baby talk, so I when the opportunity arises, it shows that I am desperately out of practice. I can't help but feel as though the baby knows that I'm new to this, and already thinks less of me. It's very uncomfortable to feel as though you've let down a 6 month old. But at least I'm setting the bar low. I'd rather disappoint them now, than set their hopes high and disappoint them when they're old enough to voice it.